Vann at 6 weeks

Share on Facebook

are playing at Gruene Hall tomorrow at 5pm!! They are huge fun and put on a great show!!! Maybe we’ll see some of you out there.

“Along with the irrefutable uniqueness of their shows, Billy Bacon’s timeless and passionate voice is portrayed beautifully in every different style of song he sings. His penchant for mixing up genres comes from his musical mentor Doug Sahm. When Billy formed The Pigs in 1984, Sahm was his primary inspiration. Ironically, Sahm has been the only artist to cover one of Billy’s songs, Una Mas Cerveza.

“.if you haven’t caught the Pigs live, I must insist that you do so at the first given opportunity. I’m at a loss to explain how Billy – a short, portly, beer-swillin’ middle-aged guy (hey, he ain’t good lookin’ but he sure can play) – is able to engage in the sort of onstage acrobatics that hallmark these shows, but it must be seen to be believed.

“You’ve got to love a guy named Billy Bacon who calls his band the Forbidden Pigs and has a cell phone number that ends in P-O-R-K. Learn that he and his group are planning to convert the interior of the van in which they travel the country into a shrine to Elvis and the picture is complete.
http://www.forbiddenpigs.com/

Share on Facebook

Well, maybe not…but that’s what the subject line said on the email my friend, DellAnne, sent me. Pretty funny, though!

Recently, a routine police patrol was parked outside a local neighborhood bar in Minnesota.

Late in the evening, the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes with the officer quietly watching.

After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his own car which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a dry night), flicked the hazard flasher on and off, tooted the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained stationary for a few more minutes as more patrons left in their vehicles.

At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the street. The police officer having patiently waited all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyser test.

To his amazement the breathalyser indicated no evidence that the man consumed alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said “I’ll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyser equipment must be broken.”

“I doubt it,” said the man. “Tonight I’m the designated decoy.”

Share on Facebook

Share on Facebook

Thompson’s Ashes May Be Shot From Cannon

Share on Facebook

OK, OK, Chris. Thanks for opening this new world to me. This is my very first Blog posting ever. A whole new world of interesting tidbits. I could spend the better part of an intriguing day reading this blog’s many postings with their included links!

Here’s a piece of this past Saturday while at the Los Angeles Chinatown’s Chinese New Year Parade:

Aloha,

Bill

Share on Facebook

This came from my friend, Colleen. Thought some of you might get a kick out of it.

You Know You’re From San Antonio When…

*You know exactly how to get to the “Ghost Tracks” from anywhere in town.
*You think “pro-choice” means flour or corn tortillas.
*You’ve never been to the Alamo.
*You think a health drink is a Margarita without salt.
*You think being able to read the Taco Cabana menu makes you bilingual.
*You used to live in a neighborhood you wouldn’t even drive through now.
*There has been a road crew on your street since before the Alamodome was built.
*You remember when Crossroads Mall used to be called Wonderland.
*You’ve been to Midget Mansion.
*You know all about the “Dancing Diablo” and the “Donkey Lady” bridge.
*You know that Wheatley and Brackenridge is the same school.
*You remember the Captain Gus show.
*Your subwoofer has twice the value of your car.
*You have three rodeo outfits but never have been on a horse
*You’re an expert with the brake pedal, but you have no idea what a blinker is.
*Your idea of culture is wearing a Hard Rock T-shirt.
*You think the last supper was at Mi Tierra restaurant.
*You do your grocery shopping at a flea market.
*You think local politicians are crooks, but you still do not vote.
*You have a “Selena Lives” bumper sticker on your car.
*You lost your virginity at Mission Drive-In
*You care if San Antonio is in the “national spotlight”.
*A formal occasion is getting a glass with your longneck.
*You believe Tacos, barbecue, tequilla, and beer are the four basic food groups.
*You rented Pulp Fiction to escape the everyday violence of the city.
*You think wearing bows in your hair will get you a husband.
*Your White mother learned how to make Tamales & Menudo from your neighbors.
*You know the “real” definition of FIESTA is “stay home if at all possible”.
*You have ordered Mexican food at a Chinese restaurant.
*You had breakfast tacos at Taco Cabana on Christmas morning.
*You remember the Joske’s Christmas display.
*You remember when JC Penney’s had a restaurant.
*You remember hamburgers from Whopper Burger.
*You’re elementary field trip was to the Butter Crust Bakery.
*You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from San Antonio.

I don’t know how many of these ring true, but I know I have experienced at least a few of them since moving here (as well as a greater appreciation for the humor in King of the Hill).

Share on Facebook

This is OK for Florida, but what do you do if you live in Alaska?

Share on Facebook

I was surfing and found a thread where people were discussing their favorite holiday songs. Thought it was fun and interesting.

This has got to be the coolest, hippest Christmas CD ever. I found it when I was working for Timberland (looking for music to play in the store) and took it with me when I left the company!

My favorites are “Fairytale of New York” by The Pogues, “Christmas Wrapping” by The Waitresses, “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight)” by The Ramones and “2000 Miles” by The Pretenders. And Kate Bush is one of my all-time favorites in general, so I really dig “December Will Be Magic Again.” Oh yeah and The Smithereens’ version of “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” is pretty kickin’ too! Ooh, ooh – and “Please Come Home for Christmas” by Pat Benetar. They are all great tracks…

Share on Facebook

Did you realize that you can purchase a casket at Costco? Bizarr-o World!

Share on Facebook

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: “I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,” –Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.

“Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff.” –Mariah Carey

“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life,” –Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.

“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,” –Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

“Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,” –Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.

“I’m not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.” –Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.

“That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I’m just the one to do it,” –A congressional candidate in Texas.

“Half this game is ninety percent mental.” –Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark

“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” –Al Gore, Vice President

“I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.” –Dan Quayle

“We’ve got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?”–Lee Iacocca

“I was provided with additional input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted in furthering that version.” –Colonel Oliver North, from his Iran-Contra testimony.

“The word ‘genius” isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” –Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.

“We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.” –Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instrutor.

“If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.” –Bill Clinton, President

“We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.” –Al Gore, VP

“Traditionally, most of Australia’s imports come from overseas.” –Keppel Enderbery

“Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.” –Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina

“If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there’ll be a record.” –Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman

Share on Facebook

Ernie Ball is gone, age 74.

“An artist and a business man in one, Ernie single-handedly revolutionized the music industry with the creation of Slinky Strings, so much so that everyone from the Beach Boys, Eric Clapton, Jeff Beck and Jimi Hendrix to current artists like Blink 182 have Ernie Ball strings in common,” said Sterling Ball, president of the Ernie Ball Company and one of Ernie’s sons. “Super Slinkys are one of the top products in the music business, and it all started in a small store in Tarzana because my dad understood what players needed.

Share on Facebook